Three men find themselves at the pearly gates of Heaven on Christmas Eve.
Saint Peter meets them with a stern look and a challenge.
“To get into heaven tonight, you must show me something that represents Christmas.”
The first man digs into his pockets, pulls out a match, and lights it. “This is a Christmas candle,” he says with a hopeful smile.
“Impressive,” Saint Peter says and waves him through.
The second man reaches into his jacket and jangles a set of keys. “These are Christmas bells,” he grins.
Saint Peter nods, letting him pass.
Then, the third man steps up, pulling out a pair of red panties.
Puzzled, Saint Peter asks, “And what on earth do these have to do with Christmas?”
The man smirks, “They’re Carol’s.”
If that joke didn’t light your Christmas candle, this next one might leave you laughing on New Year’s Day. It’s a story of holiday hangovers, memory lapses, and a husband waking up to a Christmas surprise he wasn’t expecting.
A priest arrives at the Pearly Gates and waits in line.
A priest arrives at the Pearly Gates and waits in line.
Ahead of him is a guy dressed in sunglasses, a flashy shirt, a leather jacket, and jeans.
Saint Peter greets the cool guy, “Who are you, so I can decide if you should enter Heaven?”
The guy replies, “I’m Jack, a retired airline pilot from Houston.” Saint Peter checks his list and smiles. “Take this silken robe and golden staff, and enter the Kingdom.”
Jack walks into Heaven with his robe and staff. Now it’s the priest’s turn. Standing tall, he declares, “I am Father Bob, pastor of Saint Mary’s for the last 43 years.”
Saint Peter consults his list and says, “Take this cotton robe and wooden staff and enter the Kingdom.”
The priest, a bit miffed, asks, “Just a moment. That man was a pilot and got a silken robe and golden staff. I only get cotton and wood. How is that fair?”
Saint Peter replies, “Here, we judge by results. When you preached, people slept. When he flew, people prayed.”
LOL!!
Hope this joke will make you smile! Have a nice day!!
