A man sat on his front porch, staring dejectedly at the ground.
His neighbor, noticing his gloomy demeanor, walked over to check on him.
“Hey, what’s got you so down?” the neighbor asked.
The man sighed, barely lifting his eyes. The neighbor tried again, but the man just shook his head.
Finally, the neighbor persisted, “Come on, what happened?”
The man sighed deeply and said, “I messed up. I answered one of those tricky questions women ask, and now I’m in the doghouse.”
“What kind of question?” the neighbor asked, curious.
“My wife asked me if I’d still love her when she’s old, fat, and ugly.”
The neighbor chuckled, “That’s easy! You just say, ‘Of course, I will.’ Problem solved!”
The man shook his head and groaned, “Yeah, that’s what I *meant* to say. But what actually came out was, ‘Of course, I do.’”
LOL!!
Hope this joke will make you smile! Have a nice day!
A married couple is driving along a highway
A married couple is driving along a highway doing a steady 40 miles per hour.
The husband is behind the wheel.
His wife suddenly looks across at him and speaks in a clear voice. “I know we have been married for over twenty years, but I want a divorce.”
The husband says nothing.
He keeps looking at the road ahead but slowly increases his speed to 45mph.
The wife speaks again. “I don’t want you to try to talk me out of it.”
She says, “Because I’ve been having an affair with your best friend, and he is a far better lover than you are.”
Again the husband stays quiet but grips the steering wheel more tightly and slowly increases the speed to 55mph.
She pushes her luck.
“I want a house.” She says insistently.
Up to 60 mph.
“I want the car, too.” She continues.
65mph.
“And,” she says, “I’ll have the bank accounts, all the credit cards, and the boat!”
The car slowly starts veering towards a massive concrete bridge.
This makes her nervous, so she asks him, “Isn’t there anything you want?”
The husband at last replies in a quiet and controlled voice.
“No, I’ve got everything I need, ” he says.
“Oh, really,” she inquires. “So what have you got?”
Just before they slam into the wall at 65mph, the husband turns to her and smiles.
“The airbag!”
LOL!!
Hope this joke will make you smile! Have a nice day!!
