A defendant in a lawsuit involving large sums of money was talking to his lawyer.
‘If I lose this case, I’ll be ruined.’
‘It’s in the judge’s hands now,’ said the lawyer.
‘Would it help if I sent the judge a box of cigars?’
‘Oh no! This judge is a stickler for this behavior. That kind of stunt would turn him against you. He may even charge you with contempt of court. In fact, you should avoid even looking at the judge.’
The judge eventually ruled in favor of the defendant.
‘Thanks for the tip about the cigars,’ the defendant said to his lawyer as he exited the courthouse. It works!’
‘I’m sure we would have lost the case if you’d sent them.’
‘But, I did send them.’
‘What? You did?’ said the lawyer, incredulously.
‘Yes. That’s how we won the case.’
‘I don’t understand,’ said the lawyer.
…
..
.
‘It’s easy. I sent the cigars to the judge, but enclosed the plaintiff’s business card.’
A grocer put up a sign that read
A grocer put up a sign that read
“Eggplants, 25 cents each — three for a dollar.”
All day long, customers came in exclaiming: “Don’t be ridiculous! I should get four for a dollar!”
Meekly the grocer agreed and packaged four eggplants.
The tailor next door had been watching these antics and finally asked the grocer, “Aren’t you going to fix the mistake on your sign?”
…
..
.
“What mistake?” the grocer asked. “Before I put up that sign no one ever bought more than one eggplant”
