A brunette goes into a doctor’s office and says that her body hurts wherever she touches it.
“Impossible,” says the doctor. “Show me.”
She takes her finger, presses on her elbow, and screams in agony.
She pushes her knee and screams, pushes her ankle and screams, and so it goes on; everywhere she touches makes her scream with pain.
The doctor says, “You’re not really a brunette are you?”
She says, “No, I dyed my hair. I’m naturally blonde.”
…
..
.
“I thought so,” he says. “Your finger is broken.”
Two boys go camping
Two boys go camping and pack a cooler with sandwiches and beer. After three days of walking, they arrive at a great spot but realize they’ve forgotten a bottle opener.
The first boy turns to the second and says, “You’ve gotta go back and get the opener or else we have no beer.”
“No way,” says the second. “By the time I get back, you will have eaten all the food.”
“I promise I won’t do It,” says the Newfie. “Just hurry!”
Nine full days pass and there’s still no sign of the second boy. Exasperated and starving, the first Newfie digs into the sandwiches.
…
..
.
Suddenly, the second boy pops out from behind a rock and yells, “I knew it! I’m not freaking going!”
