My 3 year old daughter came to me and asked:
“Mommy, where does poo come from?”
I decided it was best to explain it at a level she would understand so I said: “You just had breakfast?”
“Yes”, she replied.
“Well, the food goes in your mouth down into your tummy. Our body takes all the good stuff it needs out of the food and then what’s left goes down to your bottom and when you go to the toilet that comes out as poo.”
She looked confused and stared at me in stunned silence for a few seconds.
Then asked: “And Tigger?”
My daughter hates school.
One weekend, she cried and fretted and tried every excuse not to go back on Monday.
Sunday morning on the way home from brunch, the crying and whining built to a crescendo.
At the end of my rope, I finally stopped the car and explained, “Honey, it’s a law. If you don’t go to school, they’ll put daddy in jail.”
She looked at me, thought for a moment, then asked, “How long would you have to stay?”
As Joe was trying to pack for vacation, his 3-year-old daughter was having a great time playing on the bed.
At one point, she said, “Daddy, look at this,” and stuck out two of her fingers.
Trying to keep her entertained, he reached out and stuck her fingers in his mouth and said, “Daddy’s gonna eat your fingers!” pretending to eat them before he rushed out of the room again.
When Joe returned, his daughter was standing on the bed staring at her fingers with a devastated look on her face and tears streaming down her face…
Joe said, “What’s wrong honey?”
Dejected, sad and broken, she looked up at him and said, “Daddy, where’s my booger?”
A proud new father sits down with his dad to have a drink.
“Well son, now that you have a son of your own its time I gave you something.”
“Dad you don´t mea-”
“Yes I do. You’ve earned it.” Says the father as he passes a copy of ‘1001 Dad Jokes 5th Edition’ to the son.
“Dad I dont know what to say…I’m honored.”
“Hi honored,” Replies the father. “I’m dad.”
