A Midwest farmer was describing his lifestyle to a touring group of city folks.
“One of the benefits of this profession,” he explained, “is that we have built-in weather predictions.”
“What do you mean by that?” asked one inquisitive visitor.
“When the cows are standing,” the farmer explained, “it means no rain is likely for the next twenty-four hours.
When they’re lying down, it means it’s going to rain.”
“On our bus trip,” another visitor piped in, “I saw half the herd standing and the other half lying down.
What does that mean?”
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..
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The farmer flashed a smile and answered, “That means half of them are wrong.”
Liz and Mary were talking in the office one day.
Brunette Mary and blonde Liz were talking in the office one day.
Mary: “Wow, it seems you have a cold, Liz.”
Liz: “What should I do now, I just can’t get rid of this.”
Mary: “Try some Cold-Doc 3. I have a bottle on my desk. Just take 3 tablespoons before you go to bed and you’ll be fine. Here ya go.”
Liz: “Thanks, I’ll give it a try.”
The next day Liz was standing by her desk jumping up and down, waving her arms in the air, and kicking her legs out.
Mary: “Liz, It is nice to see you are feeling better. Is that a new dance?”
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Liz: “Oh No, I still don’t feel that great. I took the medicine you gave me and just realized it said to shake well before using.”