Little Johnny was walking up a hill trying to pull a red wagon and swearing “F**k this. I’m tired of this s**t.
The priest overheard him and walked up to him to say “You shouldn’t use bad words, Little Johnny because God is all around us and he can hear you.
” “Is he in the sky?” asks Little Johnny.
“Yes” says the priest.
“Is he in that bush over there?”
“Yes” says the priest.
“Is he in my wagon?” asked Little Johnny.
“Yes” says the priest.
…
..
.
“Well can you ask him to get the f**k out and help me push!”
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A woman, was cranky because her husband was late coming home again
A woman, cranky because her husband was late coming home again, decided to leave a note, saying, “I’ve had enough and have left you. Don’t bother coming after me.”
Then she hid under the bed to see his reaction.
After a short while, the husband comes home and she could hear him in the kitchen before he comes into the bedroom.
As she watched, he approached the dresser and retrieved the note.
After a brief interval, he wrote down a message on it, then promptly dialed a number on the phone.
“Finally, she’s gone… Yes, I’m well aware, it’s about time. I’ll be on my way to see you. Wear that beautiful nightie, won’t you?”
I love you…can’t wait to see you…we’ll do all the naughty things you like.”
He hung up, grabbed his keys, and left.
She heard the car drive off as she came out from under the bed.
Seething with rage and with tears in her eyes she grabbed the note to see what he wrote…
…
..
“I can see your feet. We’re outta bread: be back in five minutes.”
