A country doctor went way out to the boondocks to deliver a baby.
It was so far out, there was no electricity. When the doctor arrived, no one was home except for the laboring mother and her 5-year-old child.
The doctor instructed the child to hold a lantern high so he could see, while he helped the woman deliver the baby.
The child did so, the mother pushed and after a little while, the doctor lifted the newborn baby by the feet and spanked him on the bottom to get him to take his first breath.
The doctor then asked the 5-year-old what he thought of the baby.
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“Hit him again,” the 5-year-old said. “He shouldn’t have crawled up there in the first place!”
A blonde was caught in a terrible hailstorm on the way home.
A blonde lived with two blonde roommates.
She bought a new car, and on the way home from the dealer she got caught in a terrible hail storm. Her brand-new car was dented all over.
she called the service department to ask what she should do. The service chief, being a prankster, told her to wait till the car was cool and then blow hard on the tailpipe, which would pop out all the dents.
A half-hour later her roomies saw her on her knees behind the car, blowing as hard as she could.
They asked what the heck she was doing and she told them, adding in a perplexed tone “But it’s not working”.
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“You dummy,” one of her blond roommates said. “You have to roll up the windows first!“
